"Since we then have a great high priest who has passed through the heavens, Jesus, the Son of God, let us hold fast our confession. For we do not have a high priest who is unable to sympathize with our weaknesses, but one who win every respect has been tempted as we are, yet without sin. Let us then with confidence draw near to the throne of grace, that we may receive mercy and find grace to help in time of need." Hebrews 4:14-16
I celebrated my 49th birthday last month. I have been alive on this earth almost half a century, and in those years I have seen and experienced so much stuff. Being a pastor has given me a front row seat to a lot of joy and a lot of pain. You figure out at some point along the way that life is hard, unfair, and sometimes cruel. But, if you live long enough, say, 49 years or so, then you also figure out that no matter how bad it gets, the sun is coming up in the morning. You find that over time you've been able to walk this hard road of life without falling apart of being crushed. You watch others endure some of the greatest stresses and sufferings of life, and they make it through. And the sun comes up the next day.
Figuring this out does a couple of things to a person's heart. First, it can settle it down. We panic less, become more patient, knowing that this too will pass. But second, it also can stiffen our hearts. We might have more patience, but we have less compassion. "Stop your whining! Don't you know the sun is coming up tomorrow?"
My guess is that this might be why the older we get the meaner we seem to be. Our culture seems to depict older folks as crabby, difficult, calloused, complaining and hard. "Hey you kids...get off my lawn!" Not everyone, of course. Just a few older people I know.
I have found myself becoming that person more and more. But I will tell you what is breaking up that concrete--my kids. It is one thing to go through the disappointments of life, to feel the pressure and stress of trying to live in this world, and attempting to walk through the mine field on your own. It is something altogether to agonize as your kids do it.
It will melt your heart.
You watch as a friend betrays them. Or they fail a test they just knew they would pass. Maybe they get cut from the team. Not invited to the birthday party. Their little heart gets broken. You watch their innocence polluted by this dirty world. They fight and lose against sin.
What does a parent do in those moments? You hug your kid and tell them you hate that things are tough. You listen to them. You cry for and with them. You remind them with words and silence that you love them. You hang out with them. Buy a milkshake. And you ache in the deepest part of you as you pray for them. You sympathize with them.
As an adult who is getting older and crabbier I might say to myself and want to say to other adults, "Tough luck...buck up buddy. Life stinks; deal with it. The sun is coming up tomorrow, so get over it." But as a parent I am moved with compassion in a way that only a parent can understand.
As a Christian, I am motivated by the truth that Jesus sympathizes with me in the midst of my stress. He doesn't say, "Nobody promised you that life would be fair! Why are you entitled to an easy life? The sun is coming up tomorrow, so stop your whining, straighten your hair, and march back into this mean old world."
No. He is my King, Great High Priest, and also my big brother. He loves me in the midst of my despair and disappointment. He understands. He calls me to cast my cares upon Him because He truly does care for me. He invites me to come near to Him and receive mercy and grace. He sympathizes.
There is a lot of theology behind this--incarnation, hypostatic union, imago dei, etc. Plenty of sermons in there as well. But first, there is sympathy. "We love Him because He first loved us." How do we know He loves us? "God has demonstrated His love for us in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us." Let the sermons come; let the prophets speak the truth. But let it come after we sit for a while in His merciful presence. Let it come after we drink in the calming truth of His Word. Let it come after we first love one another, care for one another, and weep with those who weep.
Lord, don't let me heart get so calloused that I'm unable to ache for those around me. Give me Your heart.
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